A Shout Out To Single Moms That Do It All (And Make Look Easy)

Shout Out To Single Moms - Mom and Daughter

A Shout Out To Single Moms Doing It All!

I want to give a shout out to single moms everywhere that are getting it all done and killing it! You are a rockstar, and I applaud you!

Being a single parent is not an easy feat! We must rise to the occasion and face whatever life throws at us.

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Shout Out To Single Moms! I Feel You!

This happened last winter. My daughter and I were grocery shopping, and at the cashier line up, a lady started talking to Julia. We were all enjoying the interaction until the conversation went sideways. The lady, “You are cute as a button. I bet you’re daddy’s little girl.”

My chin dropped, and as I was caught off guard, I had no reaction. She said it AGAIN and asked Julia about her dad. My poor daughter looked confused at me. “Where is my dad, mommy?”

Now let’s back up for a moment. What gives a stranger the right to say things like that to a 4 years old girl that she just met? I felt violated, and even though I was furious, I kept it classy.

After regaining my composure, in a calm tone and a smile stamped in my face, I mentioned Julia is fortunate to have a mom that is also her dad. I agreed with the cute part and politely turned away.

As the store was packed, I could see a lot of people staring at me, which made the wait that much more uncomfortable.

It’s 2019, and you would expect people to know better — a shout out to single moms all around the world. I challenge you to raise your hand, make a comment telling me you have never been through a similar situation. Most guaranteed, no hands will be raised!

In private, I addressed the incident with my daughter. Jokingly, Julia has called me “dad” several times. To her, it’s pretty straightforward. I’m her mom and dad, and you know what? She got this right!

The Stigma

Then there is the stigma of single motherhood; we all run into it one time or another.

The haters oh she is probably on welfare, does she work? , maybe she should look for a husband. What a hot mess!

Stay away, she is trouble! Opinion… everybody got one. It’s easy to feel down and defeated, but things don’t have to be this way.

Keep in mind happy people don’t care about your status. Better than going full-on attack mode, just take a deep breath and let it go.

Be the bigger person and shower them with kindness. Don’t let anyone put a label on you!

Again, a shout out to single moms! Keep doing your thing and don’t waste a minute of your time to what weighs you down.

Be Kind To Yourself

First and foremost, we are all human beings… single or not. Let’s be kind to one another.

We all have our challenges and life will always have its ups and downs. No one is perfect, and the beauty of it is, we don’t have to be!

A few have it easier than others, and that is OKAY. Many carry all the weight on their shoulders, while others get a lot of help. There is nothing wrong with that. I wished I could be part of the second group.

Don’t think or feel you are alone. You are definitely not the only one in this boat. There are countless of us everywhere. Join a support group in your local community or online. There are tons to choose from.

In my eyes, we all deserve a break, but if it’s not possible for whatever reason, are you going to crawl into a corner and feel sorry for yourself? Nope! Not a chance. Stand up!

Grass Growing in the Pavement
Photo by TambiraPhotography

You Can Do This!

Instead, dig deep and find the strength to keep going and overcome whatever comes your way.

Be the woman you are meant to be! The one who turns tough times into lessons and faces life with a positive attitude.

Don’t let anything stop you. For my family, I go above and beyond. I do everything within my power for them to have a good life. Isn’t that what a mother is made of?

I knew it wouldn’t be easy, but it’s definitely worth it! The day to day can be a struggle, and sometimes bedtime can’t come soon enough as, by 5 pm, I’m done for the day and ready to pass out.

When I decided to have my daughter, that is what I signed up for. Kids are tons of work!

Rather than whining, which will make me feel defeated, I suck it up and make a list of all the things I should be grateful for.

It immediately changes how I feel! Check here how gratitude can transform your life.

Being a mom is not for the faint of heart. We all deserve an award. Shake the exhaustion and negativity off and, most importantly, take great care of yourself.

You’ll have clarity and appreciate much more what we usually take for granted.

There is nothing I regret or would have done differently. I am blessed and pleased with my life and the family I built. I can honestly say I am happy.

Reach the Top
Photo by Stokpic

Do Whatever You Set Your Mind To!

Giving up is not a word in my vocabulary.

Being a single mom has shaped me into the woman I am today; STRONG and RESILIENT!

Although life has thrown me some lemons that looked like more watermelons. I have always bounced back and carried on.

There is something absolutely empowering about being the breadwinner. In the end, you know it was all you.

Bills were paid, and things got done. You KNOW you are killing it! You should be PROUD of your story and the life you are leading.

I call all the shots, there is no one to share the responsibilities, and I don’t have a plan B if plan A fails. Still, I wouldn’t change a thing.

A lot of “What If” scenarios cross my mind with no answer. I don’t dwell on it.

They are there in the back of my mind, but I try to push them away and keep only positive thoughts. So far, it has worked for me.

This has actually encouraged me to become a better person and focus on solutions, not problems.

Happy

Move On And Be Happy!

Single parenting life is not a walk in the park. It can be quite challenging at times.

Frequently I witness mothers purposedly making life harder than it needs to be and letting their emotions drive their actions without measuring the consequences.

The goal is to punish the other parent and teach them a lesson. What these moms miss to recognize is that they are the ones getting hurt while trying to manipulate the situation and impose their way.

In addition, they end up failing their children that get dragged into the middle of it. Don’t ever forget your kids are ALWAYS watching! Every little step, action and reaction. Their eyes are on YOU!

Please, please, please, I beg you not to throw your life away trying to create problems where they don’t exist.

Children need an emotionally stable parent. They just want to see you happy!

Don’t let life’s hardship transforms you into someone you are NOT. Learn and grow from it and MOVE ON!

There Is Always A Brighter Side

Look on the bright side as there is always something to be thankful for. You owe that to your kids and to yourself.

Your children should be an excellent reason for you to pull through and leave the petty stuff behind. Your family and YOU deserve it!

Trust me, the light at the end of the tunnel is within reach. Keep moving forward and leave the past where it belongs. Life can be beautiful. You decide what is going to be.

Choose happiness, wake up with purpose and get busy. Don’t wait around and take care of business. Your confidence will thank you.

Opt for being the hero, not the victim!

I'm the captain of this ship! How about you?

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28 thoughts on “A Shout Out To Single Moms That Do It All (And Make Look Easy)”

  1. Hi Monica! Great post! I was once a single mom myself. Today they are all over 25 and doing well. I know all about the stigma that is attached to us, I had three small children in the 90’s and it still hasn’t improved. I was just talking about this to my now boyfriend. He insisted that children without fathers have little chance. We all have the strength in us to go beyond these stereotypes. I wasn’t on welfare and all my kids have the same absent father. You don’t know how many strangers were rude enough to ask me that. I managed to instill in my children all the morals and good ethics they needed. Keep breaking that glass ceiling!

    1. Heather, you’re amazing!!! There’re many obstacles we single moms have to overcome. And you know what? They make us, US! Strong, resilient, powerful and unstoppable. Keep rocking life ā¤ļø

  2. OMG! If a stranger had told that to my son I would have probably flipped or immediately walked away ? I feel you… Was a single mom for 4 years but don’t worry, it gets better and easier. Plus, you won’t be a single mom forever! ? Keep staying strong ?

  3. Hats off to you Monica! I admire you for pushing forward and doing what’s best for your daughter. Stay strong!

    1. The only thing I ask is for people not to assume every kid has a dad and that I’m married. People still don’t get it. It’s ok for me but hurts my daughter as it makes her feel that there is something wrong with her family.

  4. Being a mom is amazing, doing it by yourself is challenging but you seem to be strong and I admire you for pushing forward! Even when people make stupid comments.

  5. Being a single parent can come with so many challenges, but also amazing opportunities to grow and learn! I love how you handled the situation! You are providing such a great example to your little girl!! Single parenting takes a strong, brave soul! Great job!!

  6. I have been there. The stigma is not fun but I think the bond you will have with your children will be amazing.

    1. Thanks Elizabeth. The only difference between a mom and a single mom is that the single ones don’t have a choice. Women, in general, are very resilient and can face anything that life throws at them.

  7. Great post! You took a frustating situation and made it into something very positive! Congratulations for holding yourself to higher expectations. Life is not easy . . . regardless our journey, but it is what you make out of the challenges that sets you apart!

  8. Wow what an assumptive (and out of line) statement for that stranger to make! You handled it well and you are doing great as a parent!

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